Chapter 499

"My very lackluster current plan," Ben continues on a sigh, lifting his eyes to mine, "is to study really hard."

I burst out laughing at this, shaking my head, because he sounds like me in this moment - diving into homework like it's going to save the world.

Ben grins, sensing the direction of my thoughts, but carries on. "I want to become an Atalaxian ambassador fast - a real one. One that your father sends over to Atalaxia as part of a mission. I mean, I want to help end the war, but also being there could...I don't know, give me a chance to talk to Elias. To learn what he wants and needs, figure out...more of a plan."

I go a little pale at the idea of Ben going to Atalaxia as an ambassador - because it's already dangerous for any of our countrymen who go over there, but with his sexual identity...

"Don't forbid me, Ariel," Ben says, again reading my mind, his face softening at my clear worry. "You'd do it too, if Jacks or Luca were on the line." And as I consider that, I pull in a deep breath and nod, sitting up straighter. Because he's right - I'd do it in a heartbeat, in an instant. And I'd be looking to do more. "That's all a very long-term plan, Benny," I say quietly, holding his gaze. "Don't you want to move faster than that?"

"Of course I do," he says, turning up his hands like he's helpless. "But I mean, what else can I do?"

I bite my lip, considering my next words carefully. “Actually," I say, the word drawn out in my hesitation. “I think you should tell Rafe.”noveldrama

Ben goes still as he stares at me. "You want me to tell my crush about my mate, the Atalaxian Prince, his enemy?"

"Yes!" I say, tossing my hand up as if it's the easiest thing in the world. "Tell the Prince you're crushing on about the Prince you're mated to!" A grin breaks onto my face as I suddenly realize something. "Honestly, Ben, you do have a type."

He laughs at this, I think relieved to do it, his head tilting back on his neck as he does. When he raises his head to look at me, wiping a little tear from his eye that's not all mirth, I can see that some of the tension has gone out of him. "I do, don't I," he says when his breath comes back to him, smiling at me. “I like ‘em fancy and empowered."

"Good looking brtes, too," I say, screwing my mouth to the side. "But honestly, Ben, I know that you have this idea that things will be different between you and Rafe if you tell him that you like guys, but...Rafe knows a lot about the inner workings of the Atalaxian court and he could talk to dad about best plans for getting Elias out of there - if that's what you guys decide is best. I think it would honestly be...the fastest way to actually getting you in touch with him."

Ben sighs, nodding even as he looks away from me out of the window. "I'll consider it," he says after a moment, his eyes going a bit hazy as he thinks it through.

"Good," I say softly, my own mind turning about other avenues. But honestly, I know so damned little about these politics and this war that I'm extremely limited in what I can offer him right now. I curse, again, the stupid gender bias that sent me to ballet class while Rafe and Jesse learned politics and war.

I make a point, mentally, to steal my brother's textbooks and work hard to fix this ignorance as soon as I can.

But honestly, when the hell will I have time to do that?

Ben and I spend a good deal of time in that peaceful silence, looking out the windows, thinking our thoughts and sorting through our own plans. But eventually I sigh, and glance at the dainty little clock in the corner, and realize that we only have a few minutes left before Ben has to walk me to magic class.

"So," I say, slapping my hands down on the leather arms of my chair and making Ben jump out of his reverie. "What does all of this mean for you and Rafe, anyway?"

"What do you mean?" Ben asks, likewise glancing at the clock and grinning at me as he starts to gather his books.

"I mean, did you like...stop having a crush on him the moment you saw your mate? Did he wipe away the idea that anyone else could ever be cute?"