Chapter 26

Luca lets out a dark laugh and shoves his hands into his pockets. “Seriously?” he says, his voice a little exhausted. “You’re here?”

I grimace a little, taking a step back behind the tree. “Is that…bad? I can…go.”

“No.” he says, tilting his head and inviting me closer. “I guess…I mean, I’m not surprised. Who the hell else would I be dreaming about.”

I bite my lip a little, smiling and moving closer to him, stopping about five feet away. “What do you mean?” I ask, tilting my head, my eyes drifting over him and noticing that he’s dressed in cotton sweatpants and a black sweatshirt probably the sort of things he wears when he’s relaxed at home.

Clothes that make him look just…ridiculously good. Like the boxer he is, about to go train for the day.

“Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it?” he says, sighing and running a hand through his hair. “You’ve been on my mind all f**king day, Shrimp. Obviously my subconscious is trying to figure this out.”

Figure what out?” I ask, my smile deepening as I stare at him, my eyes roving over him a little more freely now. Damn, he’s so deliciously tall, and the way his shoulders fill out that sweatshirt….

“Whatever the f**k this is,” he says, his voice frustrated as he gestures between us with his hands, a little smile lighting his face.

“What?” I ask, my own smile falling a little bit. Because I mean obviously I know exactly what he’s talking about, but to hear him address it so blandly

But, I mean, Luca thinks that this is a dream.

“Seriously, Shrimp,” he says, shaking his head and stepping even closer to me now, so that there’s only maybe six inches between us. “What the hell is going on – I mean, I know that s*xuality is a spectrum, but I’ve only ever been into girls – I have never, ever been into a guy like this before –”

wide to hear Luca admit his attraction. My mouth pops open just a little bit.

–

My eyes go

“What,” he says, laughing and Oh my god lifting his hands to cup my cheeks in his palms, staring down at me. “Seriously? I know you feel it too- or, wait, because you’re an illusion my subconscious created…” he frowns down at me, “are you trying to talk me out of this or something?”

Luca cocks his head to the side, trying to figure it out as I gape at him, my mouth going dry as my mind whirs, trying to figure out what to say.

But I can’t think of anything.

Instead, my body moves beyond me, my hands lifting – shaking a little – and landing on top of his as his thumbs gently stroke my cheeks. I stare up at him, just…completely without words, without thoughts as the tingles that show up whenever we touch flare again.

Except this time, they’re not just under my skin they circle in the air all around us – little silver sparks, swirling around in the wind-

“See?” Luca murmurs, shaking his head. “I knew I couldn’t deny it. What the f**k is this?”

Luca looks at me, and then all around, and then back at me, his clear brown eyes filing my entire vision as my stomach turns over. My breath quickens, my heart pounding, because all I want

My eyes drift to his perfect mouth..my whole body flooded with sparks and butterflies as I unconsciously move closer to him, our bodies brushing against each other now as I tilt my head.

back in his hands.

Luca leans closer, bending his face over mine, and just the tiniest little moan stumbles from my mouth, because I – I like this I like the way my breath is coming short, the way my stomach feels just barely pressed against his

I like the way I can feel his breath against my lips

And god. I want more.

My eyes drift half shut and my wolf, somewhere in the distance, gives a heady howl of joy –

But then I gasp. her howl shaking me out of this, because…

Because this isn’t right noveldrama

I take a stumbling step away. Luca he doesn’t even know that this is real that we are both actually, somehow, here! Conscious! That it’s not just him alone with his subconscious

“Wait,” I say, my voice shaking as I drop my hands, as I take a step back. “Luca, wait –”

“Don’t,” he murmurs, stepping forward and closing the distance between us, not taking his hands from my face, “Stop, Ari, I need to figure this out. Let me try this ”

And that does it.

He said my name.

Ari. Not Shrimp.

Ari.

“No!” I gasp, tearing my face from his hands and stunibling further away. God, I want this – it feels like my whole soul groans in regret as I give this up I want him to kiss me more than I think I’ve ever wanted anything –

But I want him to know he’s doing it. I want him to kiss me, not what he thinks is some figment of his imagination. It’s not right, and it’s not fair – not to either of us.

He looks at me in shock and surprise, hurt all over his face.

1239 Sun, 10 MAY

“What

what the hell is going on?”

“I’m sorry,” I say, shaking my head and backing into the trees, “I should not have done this- I’m so sorry Luca-

“Ari!” he shouts, starting after me, his steps frustrated, a little angry.

But I press my eyes shut, and beg the dream to end, and my wolf- understanding now, I think lets me go.

And suddenly my eyes fly open. I’m in my bed, my heart pounding, my breath coming fast.

I stare at the ceiling, panting for a moment, and then my head twists, my eyes going immediately

to Luca’s bunk..

The barracks are dark, quiet, no other groups coming in this late at night. As I watch, Luca sits up in his bed, slowly rubbing his head, the low lights of the room highlighting his n*ked stomach and chest.

My heart aches as he slowly turns, looking over at my bunk. But I don’t move, holding my hoping to hell that he can’t see me awake, staring back at him. Because this..

breath.

This is maybe all moving too fast, getting too real. As much as my attraction to my mate is undeniable – maybe inevitable…

He still can’t know. Not yet – and I don’t know what the right time would be but…it’s not now, now when we’re candidates, not while we could still be cut.

I clench

my

teeth and press my eyes shut, cursing myself for the fool I am, for letting it go too far. “Come on, Ariel,” I murmur to myself, “get yourself together.” And, despite myself, I spend the next hour or two wishing my big brother were here to keep me in line.

I don’t know when I fell asleep after that, though it must have been late because I was up for hours trying to avoid slipping back into the dream state.

I do know when the hell I wake up though, because Jesse launches himself onto my bed shouting “Shrimp!” at the top of his lungs and punching me twice on the shoulder before wrapping me in a big hug. “You survived!”

I shriek at the start of his assault, but I start to rain blows on him when I figure out it’s just my cousin saying hello and not some kind of vicious midnight attack. “Get the hell off of me asshole –”

you

Jesse just laughs at me, because he knows he’s not doing me any harm. He sits back, grinning at me.

back?” “You smell like campfire. No time for a shower? When did you get

“We got back in the middle of the night,” I murmur, looking around with a little bit of surprise to

see that the barracks are three quarters full.

“Didn’t sleep out?” he asks, interested and a little concerned.

“Nope!” I say, looking around for Rafe.

“He’s in the bathroom.” Jesse explains, looking over his shoulder. “Apparently they had to tramp through swampland to get back he’s gross.”

“Oh,” I say, interested. “Hey, how’d yours go?”

“Good!” he replies. “I’m glad we spent all those nights freezing with our dads in the wilderness, though. Made things easy. What about yours?”

“We did great.” Luca’s voice says from our side, and Jesse and I both start and turn to see Luca standing beside my bed. “We were first back.”

“Hey!” Jesse says, his face breaking into a broad grin as he leans forward to smack Luca’s raised hand in a high–five. “Glad you made it.”

“Shrimp did all the hard work,” Luca says, climbing up on the side of my bed like he did last night and smiling at Jesse. I note with anxiety that he studiously avoids looking me in the eye. “The fire and the boiling water thing.”

“He’s a shrimp of many talents,” Jesse says, turning to consider me with a mock seriousness.

“Get off of me, you big cow,” I growl, smacking at Jesse, who laughs and jumps down from the bed. Luca makes way, standing with Jesse on the floor as I climb down too. “I want a shower too, if Rafe’s getting one,” I say, looking at Jesse significantly, meaning he should take me.

“Same,” Jesse says, agreeing amiably and reaching into his bunk for his toothbrush kit. “Luca, you’re already cleaned up?”

“Yup,” he says, yawning and stretching his arms high over his head.

“Why are you so tired,” Jesse laughs, smacking Luca on his exposed stomach and making my mate laugh. “Didn’t you two get like twelve hours of sleep?”

“At least eight full,” Luca murmurs, still not looking at me and rubbing the back of his neck, contemplative. “But I had some… weird dreams.”

My cheeks instantly flush and I momentarily go still in the process of collecting a clean uniform from the compartment under the bunk.

“Really,” Jesse asks, his hands on his hips as he peers at Luca curiously. “I never remember my dreams. What was this one about?”

“Um,” Luca says, and as I stand up and turn – desperately curious – my eyes go wide to see that he’s blushing. “Nothing much. Just…weird.”

And still awkwardly rubbing his neck and blushing furiously, Luca’s eyes quickly dart to me. Frowning Jesse notes Luca’s strange disposition and follows his eyes to me – taking in my horrible blush as well. My eyes dart down to my feet and I stay totally still.

But Jesse’s gasp is clear.

He’s put the pieces together. He’s finally, finally figured it out

“Shower time” I say, a little shrill, pushing past Luca and hurrying towards the bathroom, desperate to avoid this awkward conversation with my cousin.

Behind me. I hear Jesse’s hurried goodbye to Luca and then his footsteps pounding after me.