Chapter 211

Cassie

I went back early the next morning. Cathy by my side and my face freshly scrubbed so it was pink and rosy. Not that it took away from the fact that I had cried all night. Held in Cathy's arm as she soothed me like a mother would their heart broken daughter.

My eyes were red rimmed and puffy.

Ian answered the door before we could knock.

"Ian." I flung my arms around his neck and hugged him.

"Not the hello I was expecting but hello to you as well Cassie." He removed himself from my arms and stepped back.

"Sorry." I mumbled. I had to remember that this wasn't the Ian I knew and loved. We didn't have the history here that we did in the other world. I couldn't go around acting like we were best friends because in this reality he was Julian's man through and through.

"Is-"

"Julian is in the dining room." He stepped back. "He asked me to come and greet you because he's busy with-"

My stomach lurched. "Megan? Is she here?"

Ian's wuss narrowed. "No Cassie. That harpy isn't here at all. Why would she be? He's with the boys. Having breakfast and wants you to join him."

I hesitated. Casting a glance at Cathy. "I'll be in the kitchen." She said quickly. "If that's ok?" She aimed her question at Ian who nodded. "You don't have to ask Cathy. This is your home."

Cathy nodded. "That's where I'll be if you need me, Cassie." She flicked her eyes up to Julian's second. "Good to have you home Ian. I'm hoping you will be able to talk some sense into our king."

Ian chuckled. "I hope so as well." He mumbled.

"Mummy." I hadn't even reached the door of the dining room when Noah appeared out of nowhere and launched himself at my legs. Almost taking me down.

Scooping him up , I pressed a kiss to his nose and ruffled his hair. "Hey little man are you both beings good for papa?" Stepping into the room I searched for my other boy. He was standing there. Right in front of his father and both of them wore identical looks of pain on their faces.

"Hey baby," dropping Noah to his feet , I opened my arms to greet Niall and he took a step back.

"You left." He said in a teary voice. "You promised you wouldn't go away again and you went away. Papa has been crying."

My heart broke a little more. "I know and I didn't mean to make you or papa cry." I risked a glance at Julian. He did look like he had been crying.

"That's enough Niall. Let's get mummy some coffee and breakfast and then you two can go and play and-"

Noah's hand slipped into mine, leading me to the chair between him and Julian. Warily I sat down.

"Would you like-"

Not looking at Julian I shook my head. "I'm not hungry but thank you. Just a coffee will be fine."

Julian's eyes flashed. "You need to eat something and keep your strength up Cassie. Please let me-"

I cut him off before he could finish. "You don't need to try and look after me any longer Julian. That time has passed. Stop being so- nice." I shook my head.

Julian's eyes flashed. "Can we not just have a nice breakfast together for the boys sake?" He asked in a hissing whisper.

"Pretending that things are fine between us isn't good for them. They need to know what is happening."

Both my boys, my previous little twins stiffened but it was Niall who spoke. "You don't love papa anymore."

"It's not that simple." I mumbled.

"I think it is." Julian said in a hushed whisper. "I think it's really that simple Cassie. You either love me and our family or you don't."

"Of course I love Papa." I ignored him completely. "And I love the two of you more than anything in the world but papa isn't happy with me. And when you love someone you want them to be happy don't you?"

They nodded their little heads. Identical frowns on their faces.

"So because I love daddy I have to let him be happy. That means I have to sleep somewhere else for a little while and find a little house. But that doesn't mean I don't love you. I'll be around as much as papa will let me be and when I have somewhere to live you can visit after school and on weekends or anytime you want to. Nothing will change really it will just be-"

"Can I talk to your mummy for a second? Go and play outside." Julian reached for my hand and flattened it to the table. Trapping it to the wood.

Both boys looked at me with wild desperate expressions on their faces.

"I won't leave without coming to play with you." I promised.

"Ok. Come on Noah." Jumping from his chair, Niall took his brother's hand and they walked away. Talking quietly.

"Please don't do this Cassie." Turning my hand over on his , he entwined our fingers. "We can work this out. I'll never see her again if that's what you want."

"It should be what you want, Julian. You shouldn't want or need to see her again. She is the woman who tried to kill your babies. The woman who has tried to tear us apart from day one.  But you want her in your life don't you?"

He closed his eyes. "It's not how you think." He said raggedly. "I don't love her , it's just I -"

"I know." I didn't understand why he needed her in his life because I didn't know what they had been through together but I did know that I couldn't be part of his life any longer.

"I promise-"

"No Julian. No promises because there is nothing more to be done. I just don't want our separation to impact the kids. I want things to be amicable between us. So they can see that we both love them very much even if we don't love each other."

"But I do love you."

"It's not enough." And there it was. The truth. I loved him with every atom of my being but I couldn't keep giving and not receiving anything in return. "I will be finding a solicitor next week and-"

His fingers squeezed around mine. "I'll never sign those papers, Cassie." He growled out. "Not because of any contract but because I refuse to let you leave me. I'll give you the space you need. You can have the other house and any staff you need. We can make arrangements for the boys to spend equal time with each of us but I won't admit that this is over because I can't. I won't let it be."

"I don't need-"

"You will take the other house so I know you are safe and we will try and work things out. Cathy can choose the staff she needs and Ian-"

My eyes darted to Ian who was sat eating cereal at the other end of the table.

"Ian will be in charge of security."

"You're sending Ian?"

Julian shook his head. "He asked to be transferred over to you and the boys. In fact more than eighty percent of my staff have asked to go with you. I messed up but I will make this better."

Sliding my hand from under his I stood. "There is no making this better. Our relationship is over. Ian?"

"Yes Cassie?" He lifted his head.

"I'm going to find the boys, can you have things ready to move by this afternoon?"

For a moment Ian stared at me and then he nodded. "I'll have everything prepared by lunch time, your majesty."