Chapter 233

Julian

The pain hit me in a rush, like someone had smashed their fist into my heart and twisted it around. It was similar to the feeling I'd had earlier but more intense and it took my breath away.

Clutching the sink with my hands so tightly that the porcelain cracked I stared at myself in the vanity mirror. Everything about my face looked drawn and withered. Dark smudges under my eyes, my cheeks gaunt and my skin sallow under the dark stubble that lined my cheeks. I looked the same mess as I had for the last few weeks but there was something new in my face.

An emptiness that I didn't understand. There was a hollow sense of loss in my eyes.

The pain came again, sharper this time. Like a crack had appeared where that invisible fist had punched me.

"Cassie." I moaned and my hand went to rub over my smarting heart.

And there she was, staring at me with her beautiful soulful eyes , which were filled with the same pain and loss that mine held.  There was some colour in her cheeks but she was in pain.

"Cassie." I said again, this time I reached for the mirror like she was there but instead of finding my wife's soft skin my fingers brushed against cold glass.

My chest hurt, my heart was breaking in slow motion and I knew what it meant.

Cassie, the love of my life, the mother of my children and my mate was rejecting me and because we couldn't do it properly the break would be long and painful. Drawn out.

The end result would be the same though.

The mating bond would break and things would never be the same again.

Not ever.

And it was all Megan's fault.

Megan's and mine because I had allowed myself to be manipulated. I was the one who hadn't been truthful with Cassie from the beginning and now she knew things I had never wanted her to know and she was rejecting me.

Honestly it was a long time coming. If she hadn't of been so good she would have rejected me right after -

Pain so fresh and intense it rocked me backwards caught me up and sent me spinning. I whirled about and my head smashed against the glass shower cubicle. The force of my body shattering it and sending me right through it.

I sat against the tiled wall and breathing through my nose watched as my blood swirled down the drain.

Cassie was rejecting me.

And once that rejection was completed , once she didn't hold another ounce of love in her heart for me then it would be final.

If that happened I would never win her back.

In fact I knew I would never see her again. I wouldn't even be able to feel her presence. She would be completely lost to me.

I couldn't let that happen.

"You're majesty." One of my few remaining maids , her hands full of towels rushed forward, dropping the towels as she went. "You're hurt and-"

"I'm fine." I lied because the shard of glass currently protruding through my forearm wasn't fine at all. "But I probably shouldn't move."

Wide eyed and terrified she stared at me, "I'll phone for an ambulance your majesty. The paramedics will-"

"No." My voice was loud and clear and more than a little bit angry. "Call for Forrest. He's my physician."

"But he might take an hour to get here and you need medical treatment now."

"No hospital, call Forrest. And pass me that towel so I can stem the bleeding. There's a good girl."

She quickly did as she was told and rushed from the room.

Of course the smart thing to do would be to go to the hospital. The young maid was right about that but I had never ever been a smart man.

Not ever.

Forrest was the man I needed, not just for the jagged piece of glass currently sitting through my arms but for everything.

He was the only link I had with my wife, the woman who was currently breaking my heart. Literally.

They were friends and he would know how to get another message to her.

I needed Cassie to agree to talk to me, at least one last time because I wanted to tell her-

No, I needed to tell her the entire truth. Starting with the baby , Megan was blackmailing me with. The baby I knew wasn't mine. And working backwards over everything that had happened in the last few years when she was asleep

I would be completely honest and truthful and she would have to listen to me.

Cassie would have to believe me because the alternative didn't bare thinking about.

The force of her rejection might hurt her but I knew it would kill me. I loved her too much.

And I wasn't ready to let her go.

"Julian."

I blinked up in surprise to find Forrest in front of me. His battered leather bag already open.

"What the hell happened to you?"

"Fell." I muttered. "How did you get here so quickly?"

"I was in the area when your staff called. What happened here?" He asked again. "Were you  attacked? Do I need-"

"Cassie-" I winced as he began to probe the slashed arm.

His head shot up. Confusion tightening his features. "Cassie was here and attacked you?"

The tone of his voice said he didn't believe me.

"She rejected me."

He bounced back on his heels. His face was shocked. When he spoke his voice was unnaturally even. "Oh I see."

"Is that all you have to say?"

His forest green eyes flashed. "I am sorry,"

"Yeah I am as well and I don't accept it." I couldn't keep the growl out of my voice.  Not that my growling had any bearing on anyone anymore.

"I don't think you have a choice." He said quietly.

"We all have a choice Forrest. I need you to get another message to her."

"I haven't got any message to her , Julian. I don't know where she is."

I didn't quite believe him. He was lying about some part of it, I was sure of it.

"Maybe that's the truth. But you are going to help me anyway." I said firmly and this time I put all of my alpha power in to my voice. Something I hadn't done for years. "You're going to help me get my family back Forrest. So I can tell her the truth,"

"And what is that?"

"That I love them and that their is no one else in the world but them for me. That her happiness is my-"

"Cassie never wanted to be queen Julian. She's always just wanted to be loved."

"Then I'll give up my crown." I answered just as quietly but I meant every word. "I'll give up everything for her. I'll even accept her rejection if that makes her happy." I met his eyes. "I just need to speak to her."