Chapter 134

**Megan**

I close my eyes as I try to calm my emotions and all that is happening is the images of what happened last time with Tyler. Taking a deep breath I try to beg my mind and body not to go in complete shut down. Why does this always happen? In Paris it happened and I know Logan won't be happy.

I feel the bed weigh down and then something goes over my body. I open my eyes to see Logan had moved his shirt over my body. I look at him, he gives me a small smile and reaches over to wipe my cheeks. I didn't even realise I was crying.

"I'm-" I start and he interrupts me.

"Don't you dare apologise," he orders. I smirk in response as he carries on wiping my cheek.

"I don't understand this," I say quietly.

"You don't have to understand anything right now."

"I just had a flashback of what happened when Benjamin walked in on Tyler and I and my fear just took over," I confess. "I knew it was Carl and I knew that he wouldn't hurt me, I just panicked and fear took over me," I explain.

"Ok," is all he says. I look down at myself and then look back at him.

"Are you annoyed with me?" I ask. He sighs and then looks at me.

"No, I'm annoyed at Carl for interrupting us," he pauses and places his hand on my leg. "Not with you, do you wanna wear my shirt to bed?" he asks and I frown.

"No," I reply and move it off my body and move onto his lap straddling him.

"Megan," he says, "What are you doing?"

I move my arms around his neck and look him straight in the eyes. His crystal blue eyes look at me in confusion. If he thinks I'm not going to go through with tonight he is sadly mistaken. I want him and judging by the feel of him he wants me too.

"I want to continue," I state.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" he asks. I move his hands to my hips and then move one of my hands inside his boxers. He grips my hips a little firmer.

"Yes, I do," I reply as I skim my lips with his.

He groans as I move my fingers over his cock and I can't help but smirk at his reaction and the fact I'm able to pleasure him. I take my hand out of his boxers leaving him hard and ready. He's quite big and I do wonder how much it is going to hurt. I take my hands from him and unclasp my bra. Logan moves my straps down my arms and pulls me close to him.

"Are you teasing me?" he asks. I smile in response and kiss up his neck.

"Maybe," I say in his ear and take my bra fully off.

Logan pulls away from me and reaches towards the drawers. He opens one and pulls out a pack of condoms. I feel my nervousness heighten in response. He looks at me as he takes one out of the box.

"Are you sure?" he asks and I nod as I move my hands down to the waistband of his boxers. It's like he knows what I'm thinking all the time.

"I'm on the pill," I say.

"I know," he states and I frown at him.

"I just thought you would want me to wear one anyway," he states. I smile a little and shake my head.

"It's fine, I trust you," I say and he smirks.

"That's good," he states and places the condoms back. He moves his hands down my body as he leans in and kisses me. His tongue tangles with mine as he moves a hand to my core. I moan in response to his fingers at my clit, making me wetter.

Lifting me up Logan moves back on the bed, pulling me with him and laying us down. I pull away and sit up so I'm straddling him. He moves up onto his forearms and moves a hand through my hair.

"You're beautiful," he states and pulls me in for a kiss. His erection is pressed against my clit, the thin cloth of his boxers the only thing between us. I rock my hips a little causing a groan from him and a moan from me.

"Logan," I say between our kisses. He holds me closer to him and flips us so I'm beneath him. He kisses down my body to my sex. My body trembles with pleasure at the feel of his tongue circling my clit and the feel of his fingers at my entrance. I run my hand through his hair as pleasure builds. It's as if he knows exactly what my body wants and needs. His fingers move inside me, bending and hitting my G-spot, as his mouth works wonders on my clit.

My orgasm builds and washes over me like a wave, I cry out his name and twist the bed sheets in my hands.

Pulling away from me he stands at the end of the bed and looks down at me as he pulls his boxers down. My eyes meet his as I feel my orgasm ebb away.

"You're so sexy," he says as he moves his hand to his big cock.

I wet my lip and glance down at him, this is probably the first time I've looked at him naked and admired him. His cock is big and thick. I notice the slight bit of moisture at the tip and I can't help but want to pleasure him also. I reach out for him. He moves onto the bed and leans over me kissing my neck up to my ear. Moving my hands to his back I trail my fingers down his spine to his hips and then move my hands up the front of his abdomen feeling his muscles tense under my touch.

Hooking one of my legs up around his waist, I feel him pull back a little. He looks down at our bodies. I follow his gaze and I gulp down the lump in my throat as nerves set in. His cock is only inches from me and I'm not sure if I'm nervous or excited or both.

"Are you sure about this?" he asks. I look up at him and then press my lips to his.

"I've never been so sure of anything in my life, I want this Logan, I want you inside of me," I say and at that I feel his cock twitch against my thigh.

"We can stop at any time just say, ok?" he asks. I nod and move my hips forward a little making my core graze the tip of his cock ever so slightly. I watch his eyes close and he bites his bottom lip. I smile a little at knowing I make him feel something similar to how he makes me feel. "You're going to drive me crazy if you do that again," he says and licks my ear. I moan and move to kiss him. He reaches for the pillow next to me.

"Lift up your hips," I do as he says and he places the pillow under my hips. I frown and look at him. "You'll see," he states and moves his hand up my thigh. I move my hand up to his hair and move my fingers through it.

Logan kisses my wrist and up my arm all the while I feel his cock press against my core. I moan as his lips meet mine and his cock pushes at my entrance. I close my eyes and try my best to relax my body and my feelings. Slowly he thrusts into me. I moan at the sensation of my body adjusting to the intrusion. He pulls away from the kiss.

"Breathe," he tells me, I nod in response and slowly let out the breath I didn't realise I was holding. I feel him wipe moisture from my cheek. I didn't even realise I had started crying. "Do you want to stop?" he asks. I shake my head.

"Just give me a minute," I say and open my eyes to look at him. I kept my eyes shut out of fear and I'm not sure why. His ocean blue eyes stare into mine.

"It's ok," he says and I know he's wanting to reassure me.

"I know," I say quietly. "I'm ok," I say, letting out another deep breath.

My mind had made me think that this would hurt and that he'd be rough and made me think so many other things, but the way he's looking at me. The gentleness in his eyes and face tell me he's nothing like that, that he wants me to enjoy this and not feel anything but pleasure.

"Do you want me to continue?" he asks. I nod and press my lips to his and move my hand down his chest. "Ok," he says quietly and slowly starts to move out of me. He moves until the tip of his cock is at my entrance and then thrusts slowly back in. I moan and he does it again only a little faster.

My body starts to relax as pleasure builds inside of me. Moving my hands round to his back I hold him closer to me. Slowly I move my hips and try my best to match his rhythm. I don't think I'll ever feel confident enough to take the lead but I know I can't just lay here. Although the movement is coming naturally and it's liberating to know that I'm not defected.

One of his hands moves down to my thigh to move my leg up a little more. He pulls away from the kiss and moves so that he's sat back and his knees are under my hips a little. He looks down at me and positions my leg over his shoulder. I feel myself blush at the fact my body is on display to him, not that I can't see him either. His chest, abs and I know if I look down I will see him and I together. He moves a hand down my chest as he rocks in and out of my core slowly.

"You are beautiful," he says as if reading my mind. Having him not as close to me does feel better, I don't feel as claustrophobic.

His hand moves from my chest down my body to my clit. He circles my clit with his thumb over and over making my orgasm build as he thrusts faster into me.

"Logan," I moan as the pleasure blooms throughout my body, I grip the bed sheet and the pillow in my hands as my body pulses. He grips my leg as it shakes. "Oh god, Logan," I whimper in pleasure.

"Come for me Megan," he pants. My eyes slowly meet his and I can see him watching me. I nod a little in response and feel him rub my clit between his thumb and finger. "Let go, it's ok." he states.

"Yeah," I pant and his thrusts slowly become harder as I feel my climax come through me. I climax with a loud moan. My walls tighten around his thick cock and my back arches, my toes curl and my eyes flutter close as pleasure washes over me. I feel him come too. I feel the warmth of him inside me.

"Fuck," is all he says on an intake of breath before moving forward and capturing my lips with his. He groans into the kiss. I move my arms around his neck and feel him slowly pull away. "Breathe," he tells me and I smile a little in response.

Logan slowly moves out of me and then lays next to me. I close my eyes as I try to calm my breathing and acknowledge that I'd just had sex willingly for the first time and it was everything.

I jump when I feel cloth on my stomach. I open my eyes and look to see Logan looking at me. I give him a small smile and blush a little.

"Hi," he says and I feel him move the cloth up my leg. I look down and see he has a small flannel in his hand. He wipes it across my core and it's then I realise what he's doing. He's cleaning our mess.

"Hi," I say looking back up at him.

"So that was" he strails off and I feel his hand stroke up and down my stomach.

"Better than I expected," I admit and he smiles and lays down next to me.

"I was thinking along the lines of amazing but that works too," he says and moves me towards him so that I'm laid on his chest.

"You know what I mean," I say and look down at him. He moves his fingers through my hair and looks me in the eyes.

"Yeah I do, and that's what made it so good, you've given me so much of your trust and that means something," he states and tilts my chin up. "You're amazing," he adds. I smile and lean in to kiss him. I pull back and lay on my back. I can't help but smile at myself for overcoming my fear. Maybe I have a chance at being normal.